There are days when I went a little way too over sensitive about stuff. It does not only suffocate others, but I was drown on it too. I'm always harsh on my words but nevertheless, those are the true intention.
I don't sugarcoat harsh reality because I believe honesty is still the best policy. However, the after-effect of it torments me.
Never say something that you will regret - this has been what I believe in. But recently, I've been blabbering too much nonsense on people that I cherish the most. I thought they could always have my back even though I torn theirs several times. I thought I gave alot, but actually they gave me much more.
I've been shamelessly taking friends for granted and thought that they will always be there when I needed. But, no. What if we no longer see each other everyday and went on separate ways? Will we all still keep in contact and follow-up on each other's lives? True relation prevails only when people are away for a certain period of time.
Apparently, I've not been a very good friend myself. I'm a boring speaker and a judgmental freak. I can't keep up with positivity 'cuz it worn me out at the end of the day. I over-analyze every situation that you could imagine of. I have a complex brain that links up with tangled blood vessels that connect to my heart.
No doubt that people don't hang out with me 'cuz of so many reasons. But, I'm one of a kind and I'm unique; and I believe that I should be myself for who I am.
Yes - words said couldn't be retrieved, and I don't feel good about it. I knew something has changed, but this is who I am. No matter how many times I apologized about the hurtful words I said, this is still me. The incorporated attitude that I have will be with me for the rest of my life.