There are so many thoughts running in my head. None of it seems positive at all.
I have friends telling me about a certain movie that is worth catching and how amazing the plot of it was. They were excited about it and wanted me to catch it no matter what. I wasn't showing much interest at first because I wouldn't want to drag any other who show no interest in it to watch it with me. However, I was actually interested in watching it.
I ever told a friend that I envied her. She had so much blessings with her siblings and boyfriend and I doubt she doesn't have to feel any loneliness inside of her. She had so many people who doted on her and doesn't have to worry about so many things in her life. And then she told me, she wished for her family to be with her.
Everyone has their own worries and I shouldn't compare mine with theirs. But all are inevitable. These thoughts drive me crazy every single day.
I bet everyone love their TGIF and weekends right? Well, I'm exactly the opposite. I prefer working weekdays. It's only during the weekdays that I can interact with people and communicate with them. They rained positivity and lent me their listening ears when I needed. Unlike the weekdays, my weekends are dull and negative. I dislike the feeling of staying home because loneliness consumes me.
I love sharing stuffs to friends, just like when HoneyCreme is officially opened in SG or which movie is good to watch. However, I don't get to enjoy the stuff that I shared. So why should I keep sharing stuffs and let the others enjoyed it on my behalf? Why should I have that big heart to make other people happy?
At the end of the day, I' all alone. Don't bother telling me that the right one will come soon or I can always count on my friends to spend the time with. If they call themselves as my friends, then I wouldn't have to spend time alone for all of my weekends or to beg others to attend an event with me. This is pathetic and why should I be this kind of pathetic human being?